We are family

If you have been following the blog you will have seen the posts about those early days and how tough we found it as a family but I wanted to speak a little bit more about the support we have for each other and things we have learnt along the way.

In those first few months of becoming a family of 3 and having everything else we were trying to deal with, it would have been easy for us to just fall to bits as a family.  We not only had a new baby to look after but we had also moved house and we had all these health professionals coming in daily to see Alfie, it was all a bit crazy. 

My mum was literally here every day for about 3 months just keeping us alive with food, filling the freezer, cleaning up after us and taking the pressure off us a little so we could focus on looking after Alfie and doing what we needed to do.  Mum became a bath and cream expert in those early days, she and Lee would sort Alfie out because quite frankly I was a bit crap and not dealing with it.  When Lee had to go back to work, mum would often take me and Alfie out or we would go over to her house just so we had some company. 

Lee has to travel quite a bit with work and while it is still hard now when I’m on my own, it was even harder back then.  I knew that every time he had to go away that I would have the support of my parents and either mum or dad would be on hand to help me with the morning bath and creams.  When Alfie was 11 months old, Lee had to go to the USA for almost 4 months; I didn’t take it well!  But when it came to him going, I knew that I had people around me that I could rely on to give me a hand.  We (me and Alfie) decided to fly out to Boston at the end of Lees time there so that we could have a bit of a holiday and mum came out with me (any excuse for a holiday!); I would have been absolutely useless on my own and probably wouldn’t have gone!  The trip was an adventure (more about travelling later on in the blog). 

Mum and dad look after Alfie (and now Rene) a lot and I am grateful for that little bit of downtime I get and it helps to keep me from losing the plot again!  Alfie loves to spend time at their house (and who wouldn’t because it’s like a playground and farm rolled into one!) and they have a special bond.  It is also good for Alfie to spend time with them as he gets to do stuff that I sometimes don’t have the time to do (significant mum guilt alert!) I actually think he would move in there if he could!  And dad has learnt to change nappies and now has more of an excuse to nap (worn out from the grandkids – like he needs an excuse!)

My little sister has also been pretty awesome.  Things have been hard for us as a family and Becks in particular has had her fair share of the shitty end of the stick.  Seeing how she has dealt with things that have come her way has taught me that you can get through even the most difficult times, especially if you have people in your corner.  I won’t forget the day that Becks walked in to the neonatal unit and she was strong when we were not, she put the bravest face on and helped us get through what was a really worrying time.  She has always been on the end of the phone if I need her and she always says the right thing.  Becks is an amazing aunty Pakka and I love her heaps (please don’t tell her I said that!) and will now have to camel pinch her arm so that she knows haha!

Lastly I suppose I can’t finish this post without mentioning Lee!  I’m not a big one for showing all the emotions and all that but Lee has been an absolute rock throughout the 11(wtf) years we have been together.  He has supported me through some tough times health wise, he has been there when members of my family have been poorly and then when we had Alfie and thins didn’t quite go to plan, he held us all together in a way I couldn’t.  He puts up with a lot from me, keeps me grounded and tells me if I’m being a bit of a knob.  He loves me, supports me and makes me laugh.  We get through those tough times as a pair and without him I would be useless! 

As a family we have learnt a huge lesson in that things don’t always go how you planned them and its how you deal with things and move forward that is important.  We all need support now and then and the good thing about family that understands you is that they know when you need that support without having to ask.  We have learnt to put things in perspective more, what would have bothered us once no longer does.  Our experiences have made us stronger definitely as a family. LOVE.THEM.ALL